One Way to Make a Change

Over the course of the many years I’ve studied human behavior and worked with people to address and heal issues in life, I have learned from many different masters. One of them, whom I admire and continue to learn from, is Byron Katie. Her methodology is called simply, “The Work” and I have shared below some this information with you. If you care to take it further, by all means check out The Work of Byron Katie.

Based on one of Byron Katie’s worksheets, below is a very effective method to help deal with thoughts that create feelings that can potentially lead to issues that cause problems in your life.


Who or what upsets you? Why? Recall a specific situation.
To begin, relax and be still. Travel in your mind to a specific situation where you were angry, hurt, sad, or disappointed with someone. Witness the situation. Be there now. Notice, name, and feel the emotion you were experiencing at the time. Find the reason you were upset.


Capture your stressful thoughts on a Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet (available on Byron Katie’s site, The Work of Byron Katie) using short, simple sentences.
Staying anchored in the situation, at a specific moment in time, write down your responses to the questions on the Worksheet, using short, simple sentences. Write without censoring yourself. Allow yourself to be as judgmental, childish, and petty as you were in that moment. This is an opportunity to discover the cause of your stress and emotions in that moment.

In the next section you will be asked to consider the following Four Questions …

The Four Questions

Q1. Is it true?

Q2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?

Q3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?

Q4. Who would you be without that thought?


Isolate one thought. Ask the four questions. Allow the genuine answers to arise.
To begin, isolate a statement for inquiry. Now apply the four questions. Begin by repeating the original statement, then ask yourself each question. This Work is a meditation practice. It’s like diving into yourself. Contemplate the questions, one at a time. Drop down into the depths of yourself, listen, and wait. The answer will meet your question.

Turn It Around

Turn the thought around. Is the opposite as true as or truer than the original thought?
To do the turnarounds, find opposites of the original statement on your Worksheet. Often a statement can be turned around to the self, to the other, and to the opposite. Not every statement has as many as three turnarounds. Some may have just one or two, and others may have more than three. Some turnarounds may not make any sense to you. Don’t force these.

You can find more worksheets and learning at this site: