Here’s what Wikipedia has to say about EXPECTATIONS:
In the case of uncertainty, expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen. An expectation, which is a belieft that is centered on the future, may or may not be realistic. A less advantageous result gives rise to the emotion of disappointment. If something happens that is not at all expected, it is a surprise.
What Did You Expect?
You embarked upon 2019 with certain thoughts in mind … things you wanted to see happen for you when it comes to your health, wellness, and life. We all look at a new year as another opportunity to start fresh and get the job done right this time. Now that we’re into the second month of 2019, maybe you’d like to revisit the things you want to see for this year and determine what is realistic and what could be reshaped into something that could work for you.
You see, when you have expectations that are unrealistic, whether your own or those of others in your life, when they’re not met you will likely find yourself disappointed. How many of you remember hearing someone of importance to you tell you they’re disappointed in you? Why? Because they had an expectation and you failed to meet it. Or, maybe you’ve had great expectations for yourself and didn’t achieve what you wanted to achieve within the timeframe you’d allotted. How did you feel about yourself?
Expectations Can Lead to Disappointment
When we’re disappointed in ourselves or someone else, our speech changes. It becomes more negative and discouraging. A person who lives with the emotion of disappointment on a regular basis soon finds their sense of themselves begins to wither and change.
This is readily seen in children who are reminded by a parent or teacher with high expectations that the child has missed the mark, one more time. Adults who are constantly under fire to meet expectations, like children, develop performance anxiety. This, unfortunately, isn’t the end of the road though.
Constant Disappointment Can Lead to Poor Self-Esteem
Constant disappointment can, over time, lead to poor self-esteem. Do you struggle with feelings of low self-worth, poor self-image, lack of self-esteem, and no self-love or respect? I encourage you to check out your expectations of yourself and what you’ve allowed to be placed on you from others. Are they healthy expectations? Are they realistic?
You’re probably asking if all expectations lead one down a dark and disappointing path. The answer, of course, is NO. Not all expectations end poorly. There are some really healthy expectations you can create for yourself that will support success and a sense of accomplishment and value in your life.
Setting Good Expectations for Yourself
Many years ago I heard someone say, “You don’t have a right to expect that from me.” I couldn’t tell you now what “that” was, but those words have stayed with me until this day. It’s an interesting concept to ponder.
Here are some thoughts to help you with setting realistic and healthy expectations for yourself.
Are you asking for too much too soon?
Are the expectations clear for you? Can you articulate them clearly for yourself?
Do you know where you need expectations?
Are you putting pressure on someone to perform according to your rules?
When embarking upon a fitness program or making changes nutritionally, do you expect to wake up one morning soon after you begin with the body you dreamed of when you were much younger? Don’t laugh. Many people do. Is it realistic to expect that? Your sensible mind would laugh and say, Of course not. But …
What do you expect?